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2,725 Comments
1. I will stop the wait by showing up in my relationship by focusing on more laughter, letting go of perfection, and being more alive.
2. I will speak beautiful words to my body, get more massages, use lotion more and speak love.
Relationship: getting better as I get older but I’m ready to just be done with being overweight. I want to discover my natural weight, ie my comfortable in my own skin weight. That’s my new goal. Fun:dance with my daughter and giggle.
These messages are so insightful .. Wonderful and uplifting .. Thanks so much Sarah xx
You’re so welcome! I would love to hear more about what your takeaways are from these video.
Amazing video! Watch a film.
I love going to the cinema alone- such a decadent adventure!
Waiting on the wait- I’m going to clean out and organize my home. I have let things get cluttered and I keep waiting for the right day to tackle the project. It starts today!
Love- going out on a date tomorrow! Going to be present in the moment, listen and know that I am “worthy” and “enough “to enjoy the evening with my date.
Body relationship- mani/pedi once a month, message and chiropractor appointments, skin care routine, and more sleep.
For me, it’s not a weight issue. Autoimmune issues prevent me from keeping in the shape I was or enjoying physical activities that I love, like dancing. I need to start making plans to go out dancing and stick to it no matter how tired I am. My relationship just ended abruptly and I have spent the past 2 months trying to figure out why. I started this challenge to get me moving and doing things for myself again.
My number 1 struggle with my body is my belly weight. I have gone through 3 surgerys where i have had my stomach cut open. The way it is now just disgusts me. To the point where i do not have a full length mirror in my house.
For fun i am going to enjoy a nice walk with a friend and enjoy all the colours of fall.
I’m going to get a pedicure.
As for how I feel about my body – I am deeply ashamed of it. I am 80-100lbs over weight and I allow that to stop me from doing and participating in so many things. I desperately want to change that and to be someone who doesn’t run and hide from people who last saw me when I was much thinner.
1) I am going to focus more on if I like my connection with my date rather than worried if my date likes my appearance
2) ok I hate admitting this but I’m the laziest non shaver! My action is to shave my hairy beasts of legs daily so I can get out of my long pants and skirt mode and start showing off more skin! And moisturize!!!
I’ve just left my husband of 24 years so my side of the relationship concerns what I’ll do for me….and that is rebuild from the ground up, financially and emotionally and that starts TODAY. No more putting off until tomorrow, I’m making today the first day of the rest of MY life.
My relationship with my body also changes today; no more criticising my thighs or grabbing my stomach….that all stops today. Only love and adoration for my incredibly strong, resiliant amazing body xx
Pedicures. I ? when my feet are pretty.
I am going to organise a dinner date witn my husband.
I am going to go to the beach with my daughter and swim!
I am going to spend my next paycheck on a term of dance classes 🙂
I am going to do the Fireproof journal again, so that every day I am doing something mindful to connect with my husband. I am going to dress in the styles I love now as much as possible instead of waiting to be skinny to do it
Body relationship is not hate but not love either. I was anorexic 25 years ago and am now considered obese by my doctor. My identity was always wrapped up in how “good” my body was as a dancer, fitness instructor, etc. Everyone seemed to envy and comment on my body until it started to change drastically at the age of 38 after the birth of my 3rd child and suffering from a horrible postpartum depression requiring medication which put 20 pounds on. I was stricken with adrenal fatigue syndrome at the age of 42 which put another 25 on.
Fun today will be traveling to a nearby city on this beautiful day for a meditation seminar albeit by myself.
Waiting on the wait–I feel like I was really on an upward trajectory last year after my breakup (I did a ton of personal growth work, started a blog, began a coaching certification program, did a lot of travel–a LOT of action) and now I’m in this hole with less energy and optimism. This has also resulted in weight gain that I’m so frustrated by, but I also have not been motivated to do much about it (which further accelerates the shame cycle).
But Fall is my season, and I need to make a renewed commitment to myself, and my body. I’ll always be a curvy woman, and that’s okay. I just know that I need to move more (dog walks are the BEST) and really start to break away from this cycle of eating and hiding.
As for romantic relationships, I have not wanted to put myself out there for dating again. I’m still very ambivalent, so that’s something I’ll need to reflect on. For now, I want to make this time about getting my glow back, and becoming my own role model 🙂
The video brought me to tears. The journey sounded like I could have written it. What moved me the most was when you discussed your relationship with your body and referred to it as “she.” She is much more personal than “my body.” “She” is a good friend who i want to be with and want the best for; “my body” is much more distant. Just a third party somewhere over there. So just that shift, made me realize the disgust I feel sometimes with parts of my body or the things I do to it through yo-yo dieting etc is not healthy. Thank you!
I struggled a bit with this one.
I suppose the waiting on the weight applies to most of my life so I need to think a bit more about that.
Love-My husband and I live quite a simple life and laugh and enjoy the little things. I would say we are close and get along well but I think he would like it if there was more intimate moments, a bit of romance maybe. So I will do something nice for him to make him feel loved. I have recently started some new medication and by arount 4 in the evening my energy levels drop so for over a week now I have been propped up in bed in the evening after work. He joins me sometimes and we still get along fine but I dont want him to start feeling alone or like I don’t want his company. Im going to make the effort to be downstairs in the evenings from now on as I am sure my body is adjusting to these new tablets.
Taking care of my body-
I do actually feel like I should do this more.I get my hair and eyebrows done every 8 weeks and I use nice products on my face and take care of my appearance clothes wise but I suppose the rest of my body from neck downwards and under my clothes is quite neglected! I dont hate my body that much, I just don’t pay it much attention. I think I will spend 1 day a week exfoliating, de fluffing and moisturising and I will do a manicure and pedicure too. I also thinki need to care for my body from the inside too.I eat well, with the odd treat at weekends but I take quite a few painkillers so I am really going to watch that. Also I am going to try drinking more water at work onstead of coffee.
Thanks Sarah for the motivation xx
Waiting on the Wait….time to take first step to make new friendships with other single women and reconnect with older friendships that have taken different paths.
Love….Put myself in situations to potentially meet someone to welcome into my life.
Just get out there and get noticed.
Just MOVE MY BODY!…every day, in some way. Be brave to take a dance lesson. ZUMBA!
To start living in the now I’m going to clean out my closet of all the clothes that are too small that I keep saying I will lose weight to get back into
I think I need to love myself before Iam going to worry about a relationship but if someone asks me out I’m going to go
And to be better to my body I’m going to start taking my makeup off every night before bed AND for every negative comment when looking in the mirror I’m going to make myself say something nice about my body.
This video was exactly what I needed to hear. I so often find myself complaining about what my husband is doing wrong in our marriage and now what I am doing. I think something that I can do to show up more in my relationship is to make sure that when my husband comes home from work I am not still in my pajamas and also not immediately complain about everything the kids did that drove me crazy.
And what I am going to do to do better my relationship with myself it to try and go to a dance class once a week. I grew up dancing and I love it and I never take the time do to it because I’m not confident in my body but I am going to put that aside and love myself for exactly who I am and do what I love.
I will treat my “now body” as I would the “after losing the weight body”-with kindness and care.
I will find strength to finally end an unhealthy relationship because I deserve more.
I am bad about fluffing off a compliment from my hubby. I’ll say something negative in return to my husbands sweet compliment towards me instead of just saying thank you. I will be more mindful of when I’m doing this & try my best to just take the compliment because I know he is being sincere. I will also show up more by giving him more compliments.
To stop waiting on the weight… hmm… I would have to say to be brave enough to wear leggings this season. I have always felt that I couldn’t because I am bigger, but have always loved that style. So I will buy a pair & bravely wear it out!
I am going to start hiking trails more. The fresh air & sunshine feel good on my skin. When you climb up a rock trail, knowing you are overweight & semi out of breath, it feels very empowering & exhilarating! Being in nature, I feel it makes me more keen to my senses. I want to build my body up by pushing her outside her comfort zone. I know she deserves better than how I’ve been treating her. So we will get off the coach & move more!
1. How am I going to stop waiting on the wait? I do believe that I don’t deserve to have fun unless I am thin. I have a hard time with friendships. I don’t like talking on the phone and feel it is a lot of work to keep up with friends. But then when I need someone there is no one there. So I need to call up some friends when I have a night off and have e ladies night.
2. How am I going to show up for my relationship? I will be more appreciative of the thoughtful things my husband does. I will relax a bit on what I feel he should be doing.
3. How can I rebuild the relationship with my body? I will continue to go on walks. I would like to add in at least one workout video a week during the baby’s nap. I always feel so strong afterward. I will have a better skin regimen. I will moisturize my body. I was thinking of getting a haircut. Maybe a fun new style and buy all new makeup and start wearing it again.
One thing that has always been a priority for me is cultivating my relationship with my husband. He loved all of me long before I did. I can say that everything in this video resonated with me because this is the journey I have been on for about 7 years. The more everything else was allowed to fall in place the easier the weight issue became to deal with. I still fight the fat girl who would love to be dominant but I love the healthy, vibrant, happy girl enough to squash the fat one. Now u need to get to bed half marathon training run in the a.m. With a fantastic support group that does not care how I look or how slow I go.
First off Sarah I luv your outfit and necklace I. This video.
To stop waiting on the weight I am going to buy cloths that make me feel great in my current size.
To clean up my side of the street, I am going to put myself out there more and give people a chance.
I need to stop assuming and having expectations with all of my relationships, not just the romantic one.
To treat my body better I’m going to get more sleep and drink more water. They are simple things but I hear it will do me a world of good…
I’m going to quite waiting for the weight loss and finally replenish my wardrobe with a few pretty things. My excuse is that it’s a waste of money to buy something at this size, when I’m going to lose the weight… I end up with little choice and snug clothes that make me feel all the worse to the point of wanting to skip my outing! So a few new things. To help my relationship, I’m going to check myself on the complaing I do about my weight plus the negative comments about my appearance, to my husband. I get upset when he doesn’t jump in every time with a reassurance that I look good…it’s just that he tells me he hears it so often, that no matter what positives he has, I don’t hear it because I’m so determined to hate my weight. Negative self talk has to go! I’m going to use your suggestion, and moisturize -my tired feet before bedtime with something lovely. Thank you Sarah!
1.To show up more in my relationship I will compliment my husband more. I will hold hands more and not shy away from affection.
2.I will try harder to avoid sweets and overly processed foods. I will get 3-4 workouts in, in a week. Not just 2!
I am going to try really listening to my husband and how he feels. Coming home and just taking a moment to regroup and lose the day stresses and just really get rid of the distractions and have a discussion.
To start building a relationship with my body by getting more rest and drinking more water.