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2,725 Comments
I had weight loss surgery 4 months ago, and having lost about 27kgs you would think I am over the moon, well, no the weight is going but the brain is still the same, still getting the messages I am too fat and so on. I hardly eat anything but it is still difficult to be mindful when eating. For fun today, I am going to sort through my clothes that no longer fit doesn’t sound fun to most, but being organised makes me feel a whole lot better!
I think this is a fabulous idea Jacqui. I also find that removing those clothes from my closet completely makes me feel so much lighter and knowing that when I go to my closet everything there fits me well it helps me avoid letting some of those negative thought patterns creep in!
My relationship with food has been bittersweet. Most recently I learned how to put on 40lbs of stress in a few months. But this was after having 7 months off work due to medical reasons where I was able to relax and nurture my soul which resulted in weight loss of about 20lbs. A year after the stress and weight gain I’m no further forward and fight to keep from putting more weight on. I see a therapist where I discovered I’ve had an eating disorder for much of my life. But I’m a person of why, why do I do this or that so have been delving into this a lot when I came across your call with Kate Northrup.
For fun tomorrow, since it’s bedtime now, I’ll go to the park with my daughter and play on the monkey bars.
I love that you’re brining your inner child out while spending time with your daughter. I love that you’ve experienced how much of an impact really taking care of yourself has had on you. What are 2 things you can do in the next week to start taking steps to getting back into that state of relaxation and nurturing?
I recently had an epiphany about being healthy…I don’t have to have it on my schedule to make it happen. I just have to do it. Planning the week or day can be good but doesn’t work for me. I need to just move. Because I feel better when I do, not because it was part of my planner. Fun today…I’m going to call my best friend since junior high!
I hope you had a wonderful time catching up with your best friend today! Also, I hear you on the movement piece. I know you said that you don’t like moving because it’s scheduled on your calendar, but if you blocked off an hour on your calendar each day for “me” time, would that feel less restrictive? You can spend that hour doing anything really that fuels you, maybe it’s a walk, a dance class, a massage, a nap, etc. but having that time to rejuvenate in a way that’s not so planned out may be another approach you can take and just go with what feels right in the moment. I’d love to hear how that resonates with you.
I have had almost hatred toward my body. I think I fear the growing old process. I am about 50 pounds overweight. I don’t like how I look. I am told I look old for my age and I am very pretty but I do not believe it. I went walking for fun.
Hi Charlotte, the next time someone tells you you’re beautiful or pretty, I want you to really internalize the compliment and thank that person. I know it’s hard not to let the self-doubt or your inner-mean girl/woman come out, but they are saying it because it’s true, so start trying to let it add a little spring in your step.
Once I hit college and gained some weight I have gone back and forth between dieting and just trying to listen to my body. Recently I have become much better about listening to my body and eating well, but social situations are more of a struggle for me. I am slowly learning to find a balance for myself, as each day is different. Last night, I ended up just relaxing and had a nice dinner with my boyfriend.
Hi Kim, I’d love to know more about what’s happening in these social situations that’s knocking you off track a little so we can dive deeper into that.
Your posts are so uplifting. It feels great to know I am not the only one with these awful thoughts. Looking forward to learning lots from you.
Thank you Melanie. I’m looking forward to connecting more with you.
Ok. So I’ve always believed I wasn’t thin enough. Body issues began at 16 and I was at my first weight watchers meeting when I was 18. I had a tiny waist so that made me feel like my legs and bottom were huge (and sometimes they were). Funny though I look back on photos and I really don’t look fat, just bigger in areas. I have continued the fight all these years(45 this year), sometimes having lots of will power, working really hard and looking ‘great’ and then the rest of the time giving up. I have tried every diet it seems, every method, every exercise idea. I continue to go around and around. It’s exhausting, frustrating and often expensive. Your words are truly inspiring and you make so much sense. I’m a little late on here and I am going to try and catch up! I have 3 children but as they grow up and start to leave home I’m finding myself with some time. I cannot remember fun and really only loosen up when I have a couple of drinks (oh dear) but I do enjoy strolling in the garden with our puppies-they do make me laugh – such characters! So I’m off to do that today. Thank you
Kylie, how was your walk? I want you to make a list of all the fun things you can do in your extra time and then start slowing incorporating them into your daily routine.
My relationship with my body has had its ups and downs. I’ve been overweight since I was a baby. Tried every diet known, including the ones where they provide the food to you and was exercising 5-10 hours a week and still couldn’t lose the weight. The Dr’s couldn’t explain it. I eventually had a gastric bypass and lost a lot of weight 150 lbs. Started taking care of myself in this process and then met my husband and now have 2 boys. I gained weight with each boy and it stayed on. I was so stressed with not sleeping, working 50+ hours and taking care of the kids that those extra 60 lbs stayed. Then some work issues occurred that made me feel miserable all the time. I didn’t like my weight and wasn’t happy for numerous reasons. So, around January I decided to take my life back. Focus on sleeping for everyone’s sanity, Work on eating healthier (have lost 30 lbs) and change my job situation. I know the glow is starting to come back, my co-workers see it and I start a new job next week with a team that is supportive and not demeaning. It was so freeing to realize I have that choice and I need to go for it. There is much more work I need to do, but this program has come at just the right time where I am open to working on myself.
I wanted to plant a fresh herb garden to use in my cooking and finally did it.
I ate some fresh basil and tomatoes on my salad with a burger and found that I stopped eating because I satisfied, not full, but not hungry. Half of my plate was still there. Great choice for tomorrow.
Brook. Thank you so much for sharing. This is such a beautiful reflection and how committing to these things can have such a positive impact on us both physically and emotionally. Big hugs!
Thank you for this series… Video 1 was great! I am recovering from a foot injury that has had me away from exercise for a year and am wanting to get motivated to enjoy moving again. I walked while listening to video 1 this evening! For fun I am going to work on a baby quilt for friends of mine who are due in August
My relationship with my body is not good but it is improving! I know that I eat emotionally all the time and I realized that I can change that. In the last month I’ve been trying to love myself more and watching how I talk to myself…because I was my worst criticism…and that need to be changed. I am in the process and I know I can do it!
Way to go Marisol. You absolutely can and I think this whole community is here rooting for you and cheering you on. xo
1. I’m just starting to awaken from being numb. I had done recovery from child abuse 15 years ago. And came alive. It was so good to be merciful and heal. I had balance. I have since had a. Number of family crisis that I thought imanaged well. .But I put on weght to repell attention and to numbout. I gave my power to others again in my life. I am ready to be safe for myself again. Thank you Sarah.
Oh Pam, I’m so sorry you’ve had to experience so much of this, but I’m so glad that you’re seeking the support that you need and we’re here to be a listening ear anytime. Sending you so much love.
My problem is not overeating. It’s not eating right. I generally only eat one meal a day late at night. My lifestyle is just too hectic to eat breakfast and lunch. Once I get home, I’ve got so much to do I end up eating at 10pm then going to bed. Help!! And what I eat is a salad or a bit of meat and salad. Still, I weigh almost 400 pounds. What??!!!?
Hi Barbara. I think we need to get creative with your schedule and find some time for you to also fuel your body during the day so that your body isn’t storing fat because of your meal plan. Also, what time do you generally get up each day? Is it possible to wake 15 minutes earlier to prepare a smoothie for your drive or ride to work? Also, can you find 20-30 minutes out of your day to take a break to decompress and some time for you to just walk around the block, read your favorite book, journal or something else that will help relax your mind and body?
My current struggle with my body is looking at clothing sizes, i get depressed when i am feeling really good about myself, gather a ton of cute clothes to try on and then can’t get the shorts over my thighs. I know i should just shop for the fit and not the number but sometimes it really gets to me still that this awesome body I have is still on a journey. Today for fun, i rented a movie and I am going to have a big cup of tea tonight and watch it kid free with my hubby! I really like eating without distraction. It helps me focus on the flavors and shows my little guy a positive example. Today was my husbands day off so I did get to truly enjoy every last bit of my breakfast and discovered that I really do like plain avocado now, where I used to think I just like guacamole.
Thank you for sharing Amanda. I love that you’re identifying how these actions really make a difference. Don’t even get me started on clothing sizes, You could have 3 shirts in all of the same size on the tag and all 3 will fit completely different. I know it can be a struggle, but it has nothing to do with you. Find a few things that make you feel so amazing that you love wearing it no matter the size.
I have struggled with body hatred for about 15 years now, being overweight and feeling like the fat monster. Over the last year I have lost a lot of weight but realised just this week that I still see myself as the fat one and I still emotionally eat. It’s time for an end. I love the sound of this and enjoyed the first video a great deal. Thanks! X
1. I have had a terrible time restricting and bingeing. I have also dieted on and off my whole life and when I finally stopped I ate everything in sight! I am slowly learning how to love myself and I love being part of the Live More Weigh Less program. It is just what I’m looking for!
2. For fun today I plan to read a book that I’m really into (The Nest) and focus on ME while my kids are at activities.
Thank you for sharing and connecting Eloise. I know it isn’t easy, but I know you are committed to making these changes in your life and never be afraid to reach out for support whether it’s here in this community or otherwiser. Big hugs!
Can I say eye opening?! I think it was recently Kathryn Holt that helped me remember that feminine hunger is powerful stuff and often has very little to do with food. This video message is everything.
Thank you for sharing your journey and bringing to light adjustments I need to make on my own adventure.
Thank you for connecting Micki. I’m so glad this video resonated with you. I’d love to hear what your biggest takeaways were and what you’re committing to for fun tomorrow 🙂
What a lovely video and such a great approach to living in and with a body. I’m 70, and would like to offer the perspective of my years of living as a “round” person.
First, a woman’s body changes many times over her life. Some of us have yet to recover from the surprise of going through puberty. Even the most fit, trim 20-year-old athlete will think she is fat during her period. No woman who has ever had a child will escape broadening hips and fuller breasts. As we age, gravity will have its way with us, guaranteed. Don’t put off your life thinking that if only you had a different body you could/would be happy. You will have a different body. That’s the way women are built.
Pretend that a new neighbor moves in next door to you. The neighbor is blind. She has no idea what size dress you wear. What would that person “see” in you? Would she see kindness, good humor, wit, thoughtfulness, energy, playfulness, intelligence? Would she see what I see: radiance and beauty? That’s what I hope you can close your eyes and see. Beginning right now, act on your true nature, and let your body catch up with you.
Thank you so much Claudia. I love everything about what you have said and really appreciate you taking the time to connect and share this with us.
I feel that me and my body have suffered each other. Never quite meeting up to the beauty standards of magazines, my family, or myself. Being curvier since I was a teenager has always given me the feeling of not being good enough.I am trying to finally find time to fix that. I am ready to start doing the things I love again but I am not even sure what that is after two kids, finishing a masters degree while working full time and a career change. It has all been a lot of work and I feel proud about what I have accomplished but I also need to find the joy in life again and learn to accept myself. For fun, I think I will buy myself a pretty hat that I tried on recently.
Oh, I forgot to write about eating without disruptions.. I’m a horrible nervous picker and I hate it. That kills my metabolism… However, today I only lost the control when kids came from the school. But I managed to overcome the stress, sat down and enjoyed my salad! Proud of myself)))
Hi!My relationship with my body has always been troublesome….I was a bit chubby when I was a girl but it didn’t bother me till I became a teen. Then I started to fight against my body always disliking it. Things got worse when I met my future husband that definitely liked slim girls only.. I started to have anorexic behavior and was never satisfied with whatever weight I had.The wake up call came with the maternity. I simply couldn’t permit myself the further self destruction. Later I breastfed my second child till he was 30 months. That gave some security concerning weight maintenance. Besides, I became very fit and studied everything I could about the heathy nutrition.Despite all the knowledge I got and all the fitness I practiced, I never learned to love and respect my body.Then I somehow lost my balance with the birth of the third child.Stress and little space for fun brought me emotional eating on one hand and horrible obsession with weight, shape etc on the other hand.Overeating, starving, picking, overtraining and feeling guilty all the time- that’s what I’ve been doing recently..Whole mess..
I had some fun today-it was a short moment but it was mine. I swam in the pool : swimming not to entertain my kids or to fulfill a workout, just to relax and enjoy. My poor sprained ankle was singing! Tomorrow there will be more! Ps: sorry for mistakes in English, I’m Russian married to German and living in Portugal)))
Oh Masha, thank you for sharing. I’m sorry to hear you’re in this cycle and the toll it is taking on you. The video I’m sharing tomorrow is about our bodies and our relationships which i think is going to be really impactful for you. Also, take some time today to do a little dreaming about what you want your life to look like, not your body, just to see how it feels to let go of the reigns when it comes to working so hard to make your body look a certain way.
Being a six foot redhead I never ‘fitted in’ at school, college, to this day. I used to be slim until I became seriously ill 4 years ago. I have never got back to all the gym classes, the fun times dancing with friends, since then. Watching this video has made the penny drop that I have turned to food for comfort. I am at least a stone overweight and have been of the mindset of ‘when I am slim again’. I don’t like my body, I don’t feel sexy, I don’t like wearing baggy clothes to hide me stomach.
I have also grown up with a mother who has dieted for as long as I can remember, and often tells me I should be watching my weight.
A lot of women I thought were good friends told me they found it embarrassing to be with me because of my size. Or that I shouldn’t try to meet someone until I had lost at least two stones.
Anyway, for fun today I went for a drive around in my new neighbourhood to learn more about what is on the doorstep.
Tonight I sat at the table with my partner for dinner, which was nice. Neither of us wanted to cook so we ate pizza then cake. I really didn’t enjoy the flavours.
This video has been a great wake up call. Thank you.
#LiveMoreChallenge
I’m so glad this video resonated with you and I’m so glad that you didn’t listen to the women who told you to put your life on hold until you lost weight. What is important here, is that I want you to focus on how you want to feel and what actions you can take to start making that a reality.
My number one struggle with my body has been my legs. I grew up dancing so I developed nice strong legs but for years I have wished and wished and wished that my legs would be smaller and skinnier.
I am working all day today (7am-8pm, with a tiny break) but one fun thing I will do is call my long time friend that I haven’t spoken to in some time. I will try and connect with her.
Beloved Sarah!
Having someone put into words so many of the thoughts that have crossed my mind (or even similar actions- Yes, I’ve fished it out of the trash too…) instantly makes you beloved to me.
My number one struggle with my body has been that I’ve never shown it love in the moment. I am the hold out for “when the stars align,and my ass can fit in those jeans”. In the meantime I’ve been downright cruel- and yet so let down by not getting different results from basically putting my body through similar rituals of self hate disguised as improvement.
I’ve chosen to miss out from my own potential by using my current body’s state as an excuse not to pursue some pretty amazing experiences. I’ve been on fabulous trips- and yet, I’m not in a single photo. I have been a wallflower when deep inside, I imagine being the first to strip down to my swimsuit and jump in the waves!
At a recent yoga retreat, my eyes were reopened to the concept of there being beauty (And I don’t just mean appearance) everywhere, it’s really about letting go of that story or contradiction that is in your thoughts. The example we were given was to imagine a sunset where the sky is painted with vivid reds, pinks, yellows, orange, purple- a most fantastic sunset that just takes your breath away. Once we imagined it in its unique, wonderful light we were told to consider seeing the sunset as flawed. Imagine thinking that It’s pretty-but only if there was a little more purple or less orange. Collectively, we were shocked even at the suggestion. Why is it so hard to imagine a sunset any way other than nature designed it but so easy to be so critical of ourselves? Am I less worthy of admiration since after all, I was also wonderfully made?
Your approach to give love to ourselves first and that the love can then permeate all aspects of our makeup helps me to keep this sunset perspective and see that it’s not only perfection that deserves or needs love. I wouldn’t dream of raising my daughters with shame, criticism and punishment as a guide or motivator, and it’s long past time to give myself the same level of care and consideration. Listening to your personal and past clients stories is so empowering to act on this knowledge. Thank you!
As nutty as it may sound, for fun I’m watching retro Bob Ross videos with my 8 year old on Netflix. She is obsessed!
My biggest struggle with my body is self love. I went on my first diet when I was 13. My Mom had taken me to the Dr. because I was “too fat”. I had to cook my own food because when he told me to eat was different that what the rest of the family was eating. So, I have struggled with ups and downs in my weight for the last 50+ years. I have had spells of very low self-esteem and no confidence. I want to find that love of my body and the inner glow.
In the LiveMore Support Group on Facebook, I posted a picture that was taken just minutes after giving birth to my daughter, I remember very clearly (while in VERY active labor) thanking my body for being so strong and pushing through the pain to give birth. I also remember apologizing to my body for having been critical or judgmental of her in the past. Then I made a promise to her that when we gave birth to this new life that I would not only love my body and let it heal but that I would show my daughter what it meant to feel good in your own skin.
15 months later and I still feel very connected to the promise I made and while it can sometimes feel easy to slip back into old habits, I know that I want my daughter to grow up to be proud of who she is and what she can do–never determining her worth by the size of her thighs or the flatness of her belly. It’s my goal to be a role model to her that she’s made of so much more. <3
The one struggle now with my body is losing the inches off all around, especially my waist and lower abdomen! I am doing Advocare and have lost around 13″ and 8-10 lbs! :). I do feel better, easier to get around. I am also just learning to prime myself, where as before it was just put on a ponytail and get the bags, mine and kids, and let’s go! Thank you for this! I am excited to start paying attention to myself! ! 🙂 ♡ For fun I drove around a nice neighborhood looking for a house. 🙂 +
The one struggle now with my body is losing the inches off all around, especially my waist and lower abdomen! I am doing Advocare and have lost around 13″ and 8-10 lbs! :). I do feel better, easier to get around. I am also just learning to prime myself, where as before it was just put on a ponytail and get the bags, mine and kids, and let’s go! Thank you for this! I am excited to start paying attention to myself! ! 🙂 ♡
OK. I have always hated my body. I’m just short of 5.1″ and other feel like a little blob. My mum had an eating disorder and growing up she would always tell me I had fat arms. She banned sugar and fat and would feed me salad only for weeks on end. By 14 I was also diagnosed with an eating disorder I would cut my arms my thought and my stomach I would skip meals and lie about having eaten replacing food with vitamins thinking I was helping myself. I’ve had a lot of counselling and gone through a lot learning to like myself and be proud of who I am but never feeling slim an ough tall enough or pretty enough like I don’t deserve to be loved and so the eating cycle starts again. I’m sick of feeling tired and bloated and uncomfortable lacking in cofidence etc. I try to eat healthily but get so depressed my motivation goes and junk is just easier. I need to accept and believe my eating affects my mood and my energy levels and commit to eating for energy and good feelings. Today I visited my friends mum who is in respite care. I walked there enjoying the peace, had a lovely chat with a nice lady which brightened both our days then I walked home again instead of rushing and not taking time to appreciate the light night and warm air. Yey me!
My relationship with my body has ups and downs. Though I don’t have much to loose, it seems draining to reach a dream fitness and weight level. My words are self sabotage and punishment.
For fun today, it’s a walk on a Summer day with gardening after!
I actually love my body these days, and the interesting part is that I’m heavier than I’ve ever been! This is contrary to what I’ve believed my whole life, which is if I was thin I would be happy.
What I’m struggling with now are health issues. My body has finally decided enough is enough with the unhealthy foods and I now have an autoimmune syndrome that seems to only get better with really healthy foods. I’ve tried it on a few times, and for the first time in my life it doesn’t feel like a death sentence! The issue I’m having is sticking to it and not getting drawn in by the easier, less healthy foods. So that’s where I’m at!
Oh! And what I did for fun was try out a new recipe. Doesn’t sound like much, but I went to the store, got the ingredients, and a new toy for the kitchen, and it was super fun! I don’t usually let myself spend that much on one recipe, but it was worth it.