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2,725 Comments
Honestly I’ve had different struggles with my body at different times in my life. There was a time when I was completely okay with it, not because I was that perfect weight, but because I was regularly active and I dressed in clothes that fit and I felt good. Other times I just had abdominal fat I couldn’t seem to get rid of, and I felt weak when I needed to do more physical things. Currently I’m trying to get rid of baby weight and trying to feel good in my new body but it’s definitely a slow process and how in the world do I do ANYTHING with two littles running around???! (2.5 yrs and 1 yr)
I guess number one struggle is feeling completely comfortable. I don’t feel strong and I don’t like my new shape and my old clothes don’t flatter that new shape. I’ve been “overweight/obese” my entire life, I’ve tried many different diets (currently on weight watchers!), and I’ve been in and out of feeling mostly comfortable, but never completely settled.
For fun I plan on going to a craft night with some friends tonight, and I’m going to set things up at home for my husband so that I do not feel guilty in the slightest leaving him home with the boys to do the whole crazy bedtime routine on his own. 🙂
Thank you so much for your message and positive outlook! It really gives me motivation and I can relate to so much of what you said! I’m excited to do the Live More Challenge with you . (Although, I don’t own red lipstick and budget is tight…is there a substitute I can do for that day?? lol)
I feel like i am just getting to know my body after rejectin, blocking it out and critising it for so many years. It is interesting to me to start veiwing it as a beautiful energy moreso the physical shell and while i dont fully ‘love’ my body yet we are enjoying the getting to know you process. For fun I love to sing and I love music so i have picked one of my favourite songs to learn on my ukulele. My heart sings and I go into the most beautiful flow when I give myself time and space to do the things I most love.
Hi Sarah
Watching your video, so much of what you were saying struck a chord with me. I didn’t grow up watching the scales, I was luckily born tall and slim but over recent years and with a job where I sit motionless at my desk for 10+ hours a day, I’ve watched my body change unrecognisably. Two years ago I moved away from my friends and family as I was made redundant and had to go where there was work. I got in to a pattern of working long hours, eating badly, sleeping badly and neglecting myself. I haven’t had fun for those two years…I’ve not made any real friends in my new home and on my days off, sit in front of the tv dreaming of a better life, feeling low and wondering if this is as good as it gets.. I found your website at just the right time and today, I’ll sit out in the sun and think about what my future looks like, it may not be fun as such, but it’s me stepping away from the loneliness and concentrating on creating a blank canvas to start again. Thank you for your amazing and thoughtful guidance I’m looking forward to watching the next set of videos. ?
Thanks for the video it has really spoken to me. I have real issues with my body it feels uncomfortable not me. I never wanted to be skinny I like my foxy curves but the last 2 years I have become the biggest I have ever been and it just doesn’t feel right. I don’t want to go out or be seem I find social situations a struggle and generally Ihave zero self confidence. I want my foxy back not a skinny body just me. On the 1st June I started a challenge to do at lest one fun thing every day. It has been great so far and my fun thing today is to go after work to spend some time playing with my neice and nephew they make me laugh like nobody else can. Thank you once again for this programme I feel it is going to be amazing to follow eachieve and every step. Alice wilson newcastle England x
Hi Sarah
Thank you for your video today, you talk SO much sense…
I’m not overweight currently but i have been, i’ve done most diets in the book but finally settled with WW where i lost the majority of my weight loss. I weigh more now than i did a year ago and i’m further from that ‘goal’ than i’ve been in a long time. I never did reach my WW goal! I was only 2lbs over at my lowest!
My real problem is all the focus on that NUMBER, that GOAL, that constant striving to reach somewhere when you don’t even know you want to be. I have a healthy BMI, i’m reasonably fit and i eat well BUT I AM NOT AT GOAL and therefore feel a total failure. It’s so ridiculous.
I want to quit the ‘diet’ world and just focus on being mindful with my eating and i want to ditch the guilt of putting on 7lbs. Actually, all my clothes still fit and none of my friends have said that i look any different (perhaps they are just being kind!). I’m in such a stupid place and i need to get out of it!
OK so today i’m going to go to a yoga class – i’m doing it for ME and i’m doing it today.
Thank you for being an inspiration x
Hi Sarah and all the lovely ladies out there 🙂
I would say my number one struggle with my body is seeing the positive. I’ve worked very hard since 2012 to lose weight and gain muscle. I absolutely love weight lifting. But no matter how much weight I’m able to push, how much muscle shows, all I see is the fat I haven’t been able to lose. It’s taken me to a dark place of self hatred. I’m going to read for fun today. I used to LOVE to read but haven’t in so long.
Your words resonate with me. I was born a big baby over 10 pounds and went straight from 6x to 16, or so it seemed. I have always turned to food for love, for medication, recreation -food was “there for me”when others were not. It has been one of my coping helps since I was a little girl. I hid within my body, which protected me from the world. I have lost and gained the same 30 pounds over and over. My body shape hasn’t really changed until I turned 51. I lost 20 pounds 2 years ago on a very low carb/no carb, high fat diet. It really messed me up. Those 20 pounds are back, but in different places. I am learning about what styles of clothing fit my body now at 51. It’s a bit of a job to shop for clothes now and I want to make it fun again. Speaking of fun, I am thinking about Tuesday fun and seeing if my boyfriend is free tonight or picking up my new crochet obsession. Thank you for making this available for us.
Hi,
Today, I am going to work on my yard for fun. I purchased my house in october and I am creating the yard and gardens to reflect who I am and what I want. This is my first house and creating having gardens is something I’ve always wanted.
I have been eating without distractions for a few years now and it is something that is very natural for me.
My relationship with my body has come a long way. I have not been on a scale in three years and I have been working on intuitive eating in these three years. Most of the time I pay attention to what I want to eat and focus on how it is going to make me feel. When I don’t make choices based on how I want to feel, I end up feeling icky in some way, shape, or form. It’s a constant learning process.
Hi Sarah,
I think I was 12-13 when I had my first struggle with my body… I’ve never felt in my place, understood by the other for who I was. I didn’t had real friends. And now I’m 32 and I feel still like that (not about to don’t be understood hopefully I found “normal” people since) but I feel a gap between me and other people who seems to have a “easy” life. They have the job they love, find the perfect outfit because they don’t have any weight problems, they have money to have extra activities, they have friends who contact them… And me always struggle with everything and I’m lost in the dark and say “hellooo can someone hear me? I’m hear!! Where I should go? That way looks nice! But this one too! Helllooo??”
Today I have a big meating with a bug boss of unemployed office who want to force me to follow a course that I don’t want to follow. One more fight. But hopefully a friend contact me and I will have a drink with her and I will bring her to a bar that she doesn’t know in the center of Geneva, next to the river. So this will be my fun part and deserved moment of my day. I can’t wait!
I begun LMWL few weeks ago and I like when I eat whitout distraction and in general I stay more minutes after eating seeting at the table and watching outside, enying that moment of calm. (The first time it was weid because my front neighberhood was eating at the same time in front of me. :-D)
Wow! I must admit……your video has me honestly thinking in a new light. I realized that I am not doing things that I love and that make me happy. Eg. Dancing and painting.
My body or I guess my mind stopped me dancing when I was 13. I didn’t want to look in the mirror anymore. I didn’t feel I fit that dancer look. (I was no where big by any means….only in my head). So I quit only to try a few dance sessions over the years but never stuck with it.
I love to colour and paint…… Over the years, I had in my head that colouring was for kids. I am not a skilled painter but I think it’s fun. I have been thinking for months now how fun, relaxing and healing a paint area in my house would be.
I must say your video has awaken something in me. I’m 41 and I need to do things for me snd not what I think is labelled “for the young”, “for the artsy person” or care what others think.
There are so many things I love to do but have stopped. I am ready to get back to it and have my kids join in and have fun too!
Thank you, thank you, thank you!!
Carmen
I’ve had I struggle with my Weight and Body Image my entire life. After watching your video I realize I am extremely distracted when I eat all of my meals throughout the day. I feel like a lot of my problems are the result of avoidance. Today for fun I think I’ll go on a lunchtime walk by the lake. Thank you for your video Sarah.
I used to have a wonderful relationship with my body but over the past few years it has changed. I’ve begun to focus all my thoughts around ‘I just need to lose some weight’ and I feel like a failure each week when I don’t. I’m not sure why things have changed over the years and how I’ve come to be at this point with my body but I have a good feeling that your videos will help me discover some possible reasons and I can begin to work towards loving all of me again and not just parts.
Today, for fun I will go for a run with my partner and my meals will be at the table with my family, no distractions. ?
Hi Sarah
thank you so much…I had completely forgotten what it was like to do something fun…
My life story was as a child and I remember standing on the scales as a 12 year old thinking that there was no way that I was going to high school fat, so I stopped eating and became anorexic. That is when my toxic relationship started and I’ve been on a yo-yo diet ever since. Your talk took me back to one part of my life when I was really happy and loving myself, doing exercise that I loved and just being happy with a purpose and a goal to reach, I need to find that place again.
It’s bedtime here in NZ but when I wakeup ill be doing the one type of exercise that makes me smile…zumba…also I had already decided today that I’ll be walking again during lunchtime and just taking in the views around me as I walk around the lake…taking time out to think and be thankful….thanks again Sarah
My relationship with my body has been an attitude of defeat. Feeling like I just can’t get it together and accept myself just as I am.
Today I will visit a local vegetable stand and buy some farm fresh delicious food!
I’ve never liked my body much – I think we all have a tendency to some in on the imperfections and magnify them by 100! Looking back I would now kill for the pre-pregnancy body I hated! It’s not that I’m overweight – in fact I’ve pretty much always been technically slightly underweight but just naturally as opposed to bring healthy. I eat all the wrong food and my will power sucks so I still have wobbly bits on my tummy and legs in addition to stretch marks and saggy, shrunken breasts….I try really hard to remind myself that my kids are worth every mark and I should wear them proudly but it’s not always that easy….and when I feel that way anyway it almost stops me from trying to get the tined body I would love because I’ll still want to hide it away! But of a cycle really. Love the concept of this challenge. Today is such a busy day for me but I guess my fun thing will be to glare my music whilst I do the housework and sing along – music ALWAYS makes it less boring and i tidy with a smile yet I rarely bother to play any. And if I get the chance I’m going to sit out in the sun for even 10minutes and read – sunshine makes everything seem better! Xx
Hi Sarah
Your video has given me lots of fun and food for thought. My relationship with my body has always been one of why -why am I big, why can’t I do that etc
I do tend to be a home bod but I’ve just rang a friend and arranged to go for a cuppa after I’ve written this as I love (fun) catching up with friends.
Looking back I used to eat without distraction when my children were younger and was a happier person then so guess what my teenage boys might not be impressed but hey back to eating at the table together lol.
Thank you looking forward to the next challenge x
1) not able to lose weight
1) Mybiggest struggle is I feel ashamed of my “failures”. I have been through various phases of body shaming and I feel exhausted. I have used it as a way to “control” my life, but I know that in actuality food has been controlling me. My biggest fear is that if I keep on this path my actions will speak louder than words, impacting my daughter’s health and happiness in her body. I need this change for me and my family.
2) I am going to have a mini dance party with my kids after dinner!
3) Can’t wait for a day of eating without distraction. I am constantly doing something while I eat, and truth be told I am looking forward to the time out that this will offer me!
Thanks Sarah! You are an inspiration. I’m happy to share that self-acceptance has been a path that I’ve been on for many years now. While I do feel like I accept my body and try to practice self-love and care, I still have to police the body hatred at times. My number one struggle has just been being in the same place for a very long time, that place of, “If I could just lose 10-15lbs” I’ve given up the scale maybe going on 9 months now. I’m getting married next month and that little voice comes in, “You HAVE to look your best on your wedding day!” “It would feel so good to know you were at 135lbs on your wedding day.” etc. Watching your video gave me an idea for fun this weekend actually. I will visit my family for an engagement party this weekend. My little brother and dad are hunters and one thing we’ve always done together is go shooting. I’m going to bring the old scale I’ve had for years and shoot that f-ing thing! 😉 Fun for today will be getting my dogs out for a walk!
I”ve been practicing intuitive eating for several months as well and it is challenging but I always feel better when I eat with out distractions and feel good knowing there are communities like this one out there for support. Thank you!
Hi Kaytea, don’t ever hesitate to reach out for support when you’re feeling stuck. It sounds like you’re on the right track and doing a great job using many of the same tools I discuss here. Have so much fun at your engagement party this weekend and hearing what you have planned for fun, is one of the best things I’ve heard all day! Big hugs!
Hi Cindy, how have you been incorporating more dancing into your life? I love to dance as well!
Hi Sarah,
First, let me me say that this first video in your learning series really put me at ease.You have a warm and relateable way of explaining things. Great perspective. As a new mom ( my son just turned 1 on Thursday) I felt an instant connection to the body and food struggle I have been having lately.
Prior to my son, I was a fitness-a – holic. ( a name given to me by family) Not to the extent that I was obsessive ( I hope) but i was constantly on the move. I never sat still or enjoyed the “moment” I am a certified Zumba instructor and in addition to my full time career in HR ( a 50 hour week) I taught classes 3times a week. When I wasn’t teaching Zumba, I was trying new fitness programs or running. When I became pregnant, I had a scare at 8 weeks and was told to cut out all strenuous exercise. Bye bye Zumba, hello Yoga. I did enjoy the Yoga, walking and stretching and always say that my pregnancy was the calmest and most beautiful time of my life. After having my son, I had several complications that made it difficult to get back to my old routine. In fact, I’ve been struggling to find my “new’ identity and exercise routine since having him. I am happy ( most days) with my body and am proud that it carried my beautiful son. But, other days, I look in the mirror and don’t recognize the person looking back at me. She’s much more curvy, tired, and softer than she once was. In terms of food, I have always been fairly disciplined. It probably comes from following so many of the diets or programs that “told me” what to eat and that I’d feel better. I don’t necessarily binge, but I do find myself snacking at night more than I used .to. Likely comes from the fact that I am home more, and my routine is different. I really connected with your message about being distracted when we eat. As a full time working mom, I drink my breakfast shake during my commute, eat my salad at my desk while checking emails, and choke down dinner before my son’ts bed time. I need to be more mindful.
Fun- wow.. another thing that I need to focus on. I feel like it’s been a while since I’ve had any fun that really left me smiling and laughing. I am constantly feeling like it’s just a list of “to do” over and over again. When we do have some “fun” scheduled, I’m looking at my watch. So, for today, when I get home, I will take my son out for a walk, or play in the yard, instead of staying on a schedule. I’ll also try to go for a run, or practice Zumba as I’m teaching this week.
Thank you for your website and message, I look forward to learning so much more.
Samantha
Hi Samantha,
Thanks so much for taking the time to openly share your story with us. I can relate! Here are some articles that might be helpful for you: https://sarahjenks.com/blog/my-life-after-baby-how-i-make-it-happen-kind-of/ and
http://www.today.com/series/love-your-body/why-i-feel-even-sexier-my-post-baby-body-t39166
I’m so glad you joined this conversation, and I can’t wait to hear what you learn from the remaining videos!
Love, Sarah
As I watched your fun & food video, it was nice to know not the only one! I’ve tried so many different diets, only to lose & gain again. I look around and wonder why am I not skinny like my many friends. I’m so tired of looking 9 months pregnant and having chub run issues! Lol
I love to dance for fun & it’s been a really long time since I’ve busy a move, so that is going to be what I do today for fun. I’m going to crank and have a dance party with my kids.
Yes, you are so not alone, Cheryl. Have fun busting a move! Let us know how it feels. 🙂
My fun thing is dancing to a song.., some song I really loved when I was little, I haven’t decided which one, yet. My relationship with my body has shifted dramatically in the last year- since I had my daughter. I got pregnant at a time when I was healthier and felt stronger and sexier than I ever had, and my pregnancy was a beautiful time. Afterwards, at first, I was still amazed and awestruck by nature and my body, but then I started to feel like I’d moved and left no forwarding address. Like, this body is not my home anymore. It feels a lot like a second adolescence. My hips are bumping things, my belly is flabby, that whole “you’ll lose sooo much weight while breastfeeding” thing just clearly doesn’t apply to me… It’s all just awkward and horrible feeling… And I want to feel like I belong here again.
I’m so glad we could connect, Rachel. I 100% understand where you’re coming from. http://www.today.com/series/love-your-body/why-i-feel-even-sexier-my-post-baby-body-t39166 this might resonate with you, and there are a few similar posts on my blog, if you’re interested. 🙂
This video expressed my frustration perfectly! A yo-yo dieter, I have gained and lost the same pounds over and over again. I feel like a failure. I know my excess eating is caused by many factors other than hunger; I just have had a lot of difficulty not using food as a crutch / reward for most aspects of my life. I am highly anticipating the next videos. The summer is almost over and I have not taken one day to go swimming with my daughter (which we LOVE to do.) It is true that if you wait to do something, it may never happen….. so today we are taking the time to swim and play water games!
Yes! I’m so glad you and your daughter are going swimming. Let us know how that feels for you. You’re in the right place. 🙂
Excellent! 🙂 Keep adding to that fun list.
Hi Sharon, I hope you’re able to gain some helpful tools from these videos. I’d love to see you show your body some love and take steps toward forgiving and extending compassion to yourself. Let us know what that looks like for you.
Hi Michelle, I’m proud of you and am so looking forward to your new journey. Remember that these small shifts are going to make a difference; just take it one step at a time. Sending love your way!
I have been dieting since I was in high school. I was rarely successful since the weight would come back. I laughed when Sarah said we could all probably write our own diet books. It’s true! I have SO much knowledge, but don’t have the willpower to stick with it. This has definitely been a struggle. I have let myself go and there is not much pride in my body. I have been very aware of this but it really hit home when I noticed my daughter starting to develop unhealthy choices. She’s at the age now where she is starting to not love her body. If I could change my attitude and instill in her pride for herself and loving herself, hopefully she doesn’t have the challenges I have had with self-image. I will try to have a dinner tonight where I focus on the food I am putting in my body. I can’t wait to watch the next video, but I decided I will take it one day at a time. For fun today, I am going to take my daughter to the park and swing with her. That was something I really enjoyed as a kid and feel so carefree.
I’m actually barnstorming these videos. The information is so spot on that I can’t wait to see the next video. As a result, I haven’t had a lot of time e to make changes, but I have to say that my biggest change so far is attitude! I feel lighter, hopeful, more cheerful and that is such a great way to begin a program! Again, thank you!
Attitude is key. That mindset shift is a huge step!
What a great approach! This is such great advice! I have been married for 52 years and while I love my husband, I can see that the spark that connects two people in a loving relationship has dulled considerably. I will try to overcome the resentments and “conceived ideas” that implant over time and regain that glow that we shared early on in our relationship. As to the relationship with my body’ I can only say “oh my goodness! You hit it right on the head!” I have been so MEAN to myself! I would NEVER talk to anyone else the way I talk to myself daily (or by the hour, minute or second)! My new job is obvious: change the way I talk to myselt. It makes so much sense that my body is resistant to what I want/need when I am so critical and cold to myself! My new job is obvious! I have to change the way I talk to myself before I can expect to establish a connection to my body! Thank you so much for this valuable insight! I can’t wait to get started
Sharon, you are so welcome! I’m glad you’re feeling inspired, and I can hear the enthusiasm in your comment. Let us know how things go. 🙂
Hey Sharon – thanks for letting me know it’s not just 20 somethings in this challenge! I can completely relate to what you said – good luck!!!